Beautiful Star
⭐"The closer a star comes to death, the more beautiful it becomes."
I love this quote!π It’s hard to be patient when I am eager for a resolution to this situation that weighs heavily on my heart. I want a magic cure for Alzheimer's which haunts my daily life.
I feel like I'm having a good day and functioning normally. Then I forget something and feel like a failure. π’Yesterday, I was excited to arrive in Cambodia and see it again. π My husband and I were here seven months ago and it felt familiar. We unpacked, went to the grocery store, and did our laundry. I was feeling productive and good! πWe took a relaxing swim in the hotel pool to cool off after dinner. Then my husband told me how worried he is about me and how confused I was today. Wow! That made me question my own reality.π I told him that I do have transition issues and that traveling has always given me anxiety. Now I feel like a failure! π’
I want to start taking the new Alzheimer's drug and participate in research studies for new treatments when I return home. I need to add more exercise, healthy food, and social interactions to my daily life. I want to get better, not worse. I want to be an asset to my family, not a debit. I will try harder today to focus, concentrate and remember tasks. π
I got all excited recently when the FDA approved a new Alzheimer's drug. However, the new drug requires twice monthly infusions by IV. I will ask my doctor if I qualify and will happily report for infusions. πI really want to get better. I don't want to be a burden to my husband or my children. I want to stay home and enjoy life. Please approve me! Medicare will pay for the new drug!
It’s hard to be patient when I am eager for a resolution to a situation that is weighing heavily on my heart.π I am praying and wishing for a resolution. I am impatient and worried.π I am diving into endless 'What If?' questions about my future. I have waves of grief about leaving my family, friends, and home. I told my husband I want to stay at home and not go into a nursing home. I welcome home help and want to sleep in my own bed. Is that too much to ask for?
I do worry and think of ways to take action. I need to 'Let Go' and realize that the future is out of my hands. I have to trust in my family and the universe.π I have led a charmed life surrounded by family, friends, and travel. All my needs have been met, so I have to trust they will continue to be met in the future. π
I need to relax and surrender to the universe. There are powers and intelligence in me and beyond that guide my life. I need to stop worrying and planning. I will relax and enjoy each day that I have left. I have hope for a cure and more time to spend with my family. πππI hope that opportunities will come my way to try new medicines, participate in research studies and learn more about this terrible disease. I don't want it and will fight against it to the end! I open myself up to solutions and opportunities! ⭐




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